I had another horse over for dinner, and I’m still processing the experience. Unlike me, he set out wanting the genetic treatment to become a horse, much like the guy that was destined to have my current body.
Listening to his story of how much he wanted to be in the horse form he had and how long he worked to make it happen had a profound effect on me. If this is so important to others why aren’t I able to accept it and deal with it? Sure, it was traumatic initially, but, can’t I make it into something amazing now?
As you can tell from how little I’ve been posting, I’ve gone back into not coping with it well on an emotional level. The physical? I’ve got that now, and I’m almost downright graceful. But, in my mind this still isn’t me, and lately it’s getting to me a lot. After tonight though, I think I’m ready to accept that I’m not a horse freak, I’m just a horse, and maybe I can be OK with that.
We’ll see what tomorrow brings, but, for now I’m the happiest I’ve been in weeks.